I don't belong here
by Have no color
Summary: Harry's too late, so does Draco. Slash. Oneshot. sadness ensue. Sue me for not owning the Harry Potter universe


A/N: some story XD obviously, a songfic from Radiohead's Creep. I love the song so bad x3

R&R

I might write more might not

First Drary anyway~~~

When you were here before  
Couldn't look you in the eye  
You're just like an angel  
Your skin makes me cry

I was a fool wasn't I? Oh I know I was, I don't have to repeat it myself. When you were near I tried to be far. But I still was trying to keep a patch around you, to keep us close even though we were located miles away, still to keep us apart even though we were inches close. I didn't stop you when you leave, I didn't keep you when you walk, and I didn't hold you when you fall.

I've never dared myself to look into those beautiful grey eyes of yours. Those eyes that going to speak words as in poem those eyes that going to sing song with angel's voice those eyes that swirl around without moving those eyes that going to let me drown in a dream without sleeping. I was stupid, I knew I'd be able to read all your expression by doing so, but hey, what can a man do when he's in love?

You float like a feather  
In a beautiful world  
And I wish I was special  
You're so fuckin' special

And oh when you fly, everything looked so thin and weightless. You brought my burden with you as you fly and battle with the wind. You makes me forgot about everything I've been remembering, you makes me forgot to think, you makes me forgot to see, you makes me forgot to speak, you makes me forgot to listen, because this worthless rotten brain of mine would only mind you. You and you alone, you and your beauty, you and your face, you and your tousled hair, you and your firm hands, you and your floating legs, you and your look of full relaxation.

And have you ever realized it dear? When you're around, the world became heaven. Much more beautiful than it already is. The earth became the haven of living things. The sky became a ward of protection from evil darkness and even light. The oxygen became very thin like if you already throw me up to sky, breathing nothing but nitrogen. And a fool I am, having a thought that I wished you saw me like that. Because I know I wouldn't be able to change the way I looked at you.

But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo.  
What the hell am I doing here?  
I don't belong here.

Then I'm nothing but a dreamer, someone who lives in a dream full of reality and distance from the world to the hell, someone who stays in a reality full of imagination and the gaps between humans' mine and probably whatever god that ever exist and patiently waited for our destruction in the heaven.

There's no purpose to be here but to worship the carbon dioxide you let out and to cleanse every oxygen you're going to take deep, polishing it into balls of purity gas and carefully slid it down to your fresh healthy lungs.

I don't belong here at all my dear. This is not the place where a filthy creature like me should be at. I shouldn't be anywhere near you, not even in a distance of our dear long-lost planet Pluto to our all-time favorite-shite Sun… I don't belong here, not on earth, not on your sight, not in your heart.

I don't care if it hurts  
I want to have control  
I want a perfect body  
I want a perfect soul

I don't care if it cost me the whole world to be with you. I don't care if you must take away my life and my family just to be with you. I don't care if it took my entire organ and my bones just to be with you. I don't care if I was left as flesh blood and skin just to be with you. As much as it hurts, you worth it.

I want to have control over your soul oh you dear Lord of vanity. I want to touch that perfect body of yours, I want that body to be mine, that hard pale chest, those rosy pale nipples, that abs, that perfection yet you're so lithe. I want you to scream my name. No… not Potter… but Harry… I want to hear it with the lack of dripping hate and a little sharp of malice… I want to hear it with the promise of a new light and buttered with the love of purity. May I?

I want you to notice  
When I'm not around  
You're so fuckin' special  
I wish I was special

I want your eyes to look for me. Notice me when I'm not around. Notice how little I ate. Notice how I almost cut my own fingers. Notice how everything went wrong with your presence alone.

Whatever makes you happy  
Whatever you want  
You're so fuckin' special  
I wish I was special

But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo,  
What the hell am I doing here?  
I don't belong here.  
I don't belong here.

But those eyes… was full of hatred then full of love full of tenderness full of innocence full of happiness now closed. You were happy… you got what you want… your voice still lingers in my brain…

"P-Harry… you're special… fucking special… like I wish I'd always had Harry…" you smiled, I cried. "Maybe it's too late… but… you're here Harry… in my heart…"

If that make you happy… If that what you want… Draco… you're special… I wish I was special… I wish I was no coward… I wish I could tell you earlier… I wish your hell-worth of an aunt does have heart… I wish she could see… that you're special…

"I don't deserve you… no! I'm a creep… I'm a weirdo… how the hell did I get there?" I sobbed to your chest, which was warm now was cold. "I don't belong here… I don't belong in your heart…"


End file.
